Friday, June 19, 2015

Moving...

Well...here we are...about 2/3 into our move...having left our old house, town, family, friends and staying with family in Idaho...not yet moved into our next home. This has been an ordeal. I know people say moving is one of the most traumatic, trying things you can do but not sure that really registered with me until we actually tried moving our family of 8 across the country. Getting our house showing ready was traumatic by itself....the month from heck. I learned mostly that I need to clean more on a regular basis because my house was not fit for strangers' eyes. Also that I might just have the slobbiest kids on the planet. It's a feat just to undo the daily damage they do....let alone deep cleaning and decluttering....painting...fixing etc. So that's done and then having showing after showing turn up no results...no interest...no sale. Really?!! You don't want to buy my freaking gorgeous house at a ridiculously low price?!! WHY NOT?! So we lowered our price a few more times and sure enough we got a bite. So then to just absorb the reality that we were actually moving. Start realizing that we have weeks not months left....then days not weeks....then minutes not days. Saying goodbye is definitely not something I have down. And somehow we managed to make each goodbye its own separate occasion. It would have been nice to have a few lumped together....one good goodbye cry....and goodbye group hug. But one by one they came and each time I had to make the goodbye-ee aware of the fact that I don't have control of my emotions and was completely unstable. I'm not sad about where we are headed but sad about who I won't get to see on a regular basis anymore....sure I'll see them again but not whenever I want. We've moved before but this was different. I've never been as close with my family...never had as good of friends as this. The deep sadness made me feel really grateful....just like Winnie the pooh says..."how lucky i am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.." Will I find friends like that again? I'm not sure...and that's scary. I'll be ok though...I have Daniel...I have awesome kids....I have Daniel's family out here and all of my friends and family in Illinois. That can be enough right? It takes me years usually to make good friends...the kind you can call at the last second to meet you at the park so you don't lose your mind. Thank goodness for texting and Facebook. So now here I sit in sort of a limbo between houses...homeless really for a few more weeks...enjoying a semi-vacation and hanging out with the in-laws. Not sure that having moved has set in since every year we come out for a visit. The real test will be when we move in and there's just us and our new place. till then...